Christmas Dinner

As it turns out, my dad, the retired accountant, is quite the poet.  For example:

Wiener wiener
Quite contrary
How does your garden grow?

And do you have stubborn rings on your fingers that you can't get off?  You could use soap and water, but according to my grandma, you should just use windex!  She uses windex for everything! 

And my grandpa said that he wears his hair short because he has a large head, whereas, I keep my hair long because I have a small head.  I didn't even know!!!  Last year the same grandpa told me I had a big head.  He's quite senile. 

I got a puzzle for christmas, I don't know about you muthafuckas.  Excuse me while I puzzle.  Then I'll do jumping jacks, because that's what I do after a good round of puzzling. 

Well, at least there was a lot of wine, and I woke up terribly hungover.  Maybe I even shot my mouth off!  Only my sub-conscious and the memories of my relatives will know for sure. 

Now there is the pressing business of non-christmas, and the grey shadow of January looms ahead.  January: The Depressing Month.  Let's make January better by promoting breast cancer and calling it Boobuary.  It will be the month where you make sure you have plenty of visible cleavage (unless you are a man.  No one wants to see that).